Review of Heather of Soft Touch Bodyworks, Northampton

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Pretty average. Entrance is sandwiched (no pun intended) on an industrial estate between two cafes so while I wasn't expecting to see anyone I knew in that particular location, it's not the most discreet place in the world, either. Inside it's, well, a parlour. State of the art showers in all rooms...otherwise passably grubby in a massage parlour kind of way.

A stunner. Petite at around 5 foot tall, perfectly proportioned, cute as a button. What the Americans call a "spinner" and if that's your type, she's a 10. Fully shaved, possibly the best breasts I've ever seen. Perfect handful and to coin a phrase, youthful in that pre-gravity taking its effect way. Pretty face too!

In terms of Heather, I've been to see her 3 times in the 2 and a half weeks since my first punt with her which probably tells you all need to know. But Soft Touch and, indeed, Heather may still be an acquired taste. It's just that I've acquired it.

This place is a throwback to my very first punts 30 years ago...the sort of old massage parlours you'd get in Central London. You go in and they give you a massage of -- if I'm honest -- pretty dubious quality (at best, it's serviceable) followed by "want any extras?" followed by delivery of said extras in a pleasant and thoroughly perfunctory manner.

In short, this place blasts Punternet out of the water. If you're one of those delusional chaps of which the forum is replete who thinks that punting is a method of proving your Casanova qualities -- if you think it's about intimacy and what you can do for the girl, about reverse oral and "she really likes me" -- then forget it.

If, on the other hand, you're prepared to accept that punting isn't particularly intimate...that it's about YOU having an orgasm...and if you're prepared to spend 30 minutes being somewhat pampered with your needs the centre of attention, this place can't be beat. Soft Touch and Heather, within 10 minutes of my first visit there...reminded me how far off track I've got recently. It's what punting used to be before the entire western world disappeared up its own fluffy arsehole.

In short, Heather is absolutely brilliant. For 50 quid you get to spend 30 stress free minutes with an absolutely stunning girl who in a professional and courteous way is entirely pleasant (and the more so on subsequent visits) and you leave fully relaxed and with a massive smile on your face. Yes...you won't be deluded into thinking that you've given Heather the ride of her life (there's no shortage of fake moans elsewhere, guys, if that's your baf) but, as I'd long forgotten, that's NOT the point of punting.

Thank you Soft Touch. Thank you Heather. What this hobby should be about. Highest possible recommendation.