Review of Apple of House of Divine, London

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Usual good standard of HoD premises. Short walk from Pimlico tube and a handy Pret a Manger for a refreshment nearby if either early or needing sustenance after exercise.

Perfectly cosy room with a bed, which always helps in these types of liaison, and a mirror.

In my opinion, Apple is the perfect spec. Lithe, tight body, long dark hair, big brown eyes, pouty lips. She's simply built to please. Hotter than even her new photographs.

I've been hankering for a nibble of the Forbidden Fruit for, oooo, a couple of years since I live in a land far, far away. Would you believe it, just like London buses I managed to slide in two appointments with Apple in a three week period.

On both occassions I promised Apple that I would write a review. "Will it be positive?" she blinked. "Nah, I'm going to say you're rubbish!" I replied. Of course, that would be a complete and utter lie. This vixen is seriously foxy. Smooth, GFE, PSE. She genuinely appears to love it all.

Apple is a remarkable Filipina. She doesn't do karaoke. That's a blessing. Neither does she eat all the time which is a good trait to have in her business, except when she wants to devour a sausage. And neither does she have that high pitched sing-songy voice bordering on a squeal. These are all very good things.

What she does have is an amazing smile, hungry eyes, and great bantz. Oh, she also has a smokin' - and I mean smouldering, red hot smokin' body - and she knows exactly how to use it. She'll ask and deliver pretty much anything you might wish, and is not averse to taking control, too. It's not often an old geezer like me gets a nubile filly demanding: "F@ck me harder!"

Right from the first minute of the first meeting I felt immediately relaxed and I'd like to think we both enjoyed enormously two vigorous sessions. Well, I did.

I've been through a fair roster of HoD lovelies over the years and Apple is now firmly established as my "go to" confidente for some seriously good fun and frolics. I can't wait for the next confluence of flights from afar and trains from MK.

Do yourself a favour and get yourself a daily dose of Apple. You won't be disappointed.